"PIG" BOULDEN'S STORY

While Doc Holiday, "Purrfect" (yea right) for America is out being all pompous and acting like a big, important Presidential candidate, I want to introduce the honorary co-Pug for DOGS FOR DOC, "Pig" Boulden. Pig and I are cousins, but he is a few years older than I am. Here's his picture with our grandmother.

(All this happened before I was born. I may not have the dates right, but I can get the medical records from Dr. Franklin to prove my story is truthful and accurate).

When Pig was just a little Pug, he came to New Mexico to visit his grandparents. Pig comes from a home where the Feline-Americans are kind an loving. You also need to remember he was just a little kid at the time when he started chasing Doc Holiday around the house. He chased Doc up under my mommy's sofa. Doc Holiday lashed out at this innocent Pug by smacking him in the eye and blinding him!

Doc Holiday (Purrfect for America?) seriously injured Pig with those vicious claws of hers.

We just thought you should know about this because sometimes she is not nice to Canine-Americans!

BREAKING NEWS: CAUGHT NAPPING

Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America, said she was out on the campaign trail, and attending the rally for Skunk Americans. Never happened. As this X-clusive photo will show, I, Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reidhead, caught Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America, napping. That's all she does is nap.

Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America is a fraud.

I will also have an X-clusive story about "Pig Boulden", who is considering the invitation to join Dogs for Doc as Vice Chairpug. Pig, my favorite relative, has a tragic story about his interactions with Doc Holiday. You may not believe me about how mean she is, but maybe you will believe Pig. And, he has the medical records to prove his point!

NAPPING OR WORKING? You Decide!

THE CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS

BAT & I DO ALL THE WORK! Contrary to popular opinion, Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America only put in a token amount of work today as Bat Masterson and I helped to install the new HP wireless printer along with the minimal and worthless assistance of our Human-American staff. Doc made the usual campaign appearance, and posed for photographs. She paw-printed a few autographs, and then zoomed out, on to another nap...ummm....campaign appearance.

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE?

Contrary to popular opinion, Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America, does not spend as much time out campaigning as she claims.

BREAKING NEWS SCANDAL
Is Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America spending as much time on the campaign litter box as she is claiming or is she napping?

In an EXCLUSIVE DEVELOPMENT
I have exclusive photos exposing the sham that is Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America as she claims to be out on yet another campaign appearance but is in reality napping.

MY CHALLENGE
TO DOC HOLIDAY
Are you
PURRFECT for AMERICA
as you claim - or
are you just another lazy napping FELINE-AMERICAN?

The Public Has A Right to Know!
Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reidhead
Too Cute to Be Bad!

A RUMSFELD X-CLUSIVE!

Grand-Mommy-Cat and the Offending Little Ones Do Brunch

These are the kitties the nasty neighbor doesn't want my mommy to feed. Can you imagine that? Just look at the little one with the white nose. She looks just like one of my best pals, Miss Scarlet (my grandmother's kitty). The little tuxedo kitty is missing. I hope he is okay.

I am rushing to get these photos up before Doc does. She will claim that she took the pictures, but I was standing right beside my mommy when they were taken. It's my exclusive, not Doc's!

Rumsfeld
To Cute to Be Bad!

RECONSIDERING MY SUPPORT

I am currently reconsidering my support for Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America. We've had a bit of a difference of opinion.

Okay, I'll spill it all. Doc and I were doing fairly well until Saturday night when she held my new chewy pretzel hostage and refused to allow me access up the steps to get it. She threatened me with her CLAWS.

Now, I am seriously wondering, do we need someone like Doc Holiday as President of the United States.

I know she thinks she is Purrfect - but she is Purrfectly beastly!

There, I said it.

Rumsfeld
To Cute to Be Bad!

EXHAUSTED CHAIRPOODLE FORCED TO TAKE A BREAK

DOGS FOR DOC CHAIRPOODLE
SUFFERING FROM EXHAUSTION

BREAKING NEWS: Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reidhead, Dogs for Doc Chairpoodle is suffering from exhaustion. He has worked so hard trying to get Canine-Americans to understand how important it is for Doc Holiday, Purrfect for America to be elected POTUS that he has now suffered a break-down! He is currently sleeping it off, much like Harpo Marx did his insomnia.

MY LIFE STORY - BY DOC HOLIDAY

Seven years ago this evening, September 8, 2000, my birth mother abandoned me. I was born 9 days earlier, on August 31. I don’t know where. My eyes were just starting to open, but all I could see was darkness. It was night-time. She was carrying me, and suddenly I was on very cold cement. I waited for a minute, but she did not come back. I cried and cried, but she never ever came back. There I was just a little baby, all alone in the dark, crying, screaming for a mommy who never ever came back. I was terrified. I was screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming, but mommy never came back to rescue me.

My “real” mommy had opened the door to the balcony on her condo. She heard me crying. In case you don’t know it, my mommy is a ‘sucker’ for lost kittens. She put on a jacket and got in her big, red, Durango and drove around looking for me. She found me all alone on the cold cement floor in a deserted carport. My birth mommy was no where in sight.

She picked me up and held me close. I was still crying and trembling. She held me to keep me warm as she drove back to what became my home. She wrapped me in a warm cloth and held me as she called Dr. Franklin. I was crying, very loud. He told mommy what to get to feed me. She took me with her in the big red Durango as she drove to the store, and carried me inside with her, as she bought powdered baby milk.

After we went back home, Clancy, a very nice miniature poodle who died a couple of years ago wanted to play with me. Siggy and Brunhilda were curious. My new mommy was very upset. She found a little tiny Igloo cooler and put warm towels in it. She taped a pencil on the top of the cooler so the lid would not completely close. That way I would be warm and have plenty of good air to breathe. I was still crying. She mixed the powdered kitty milk and fed me with a dropper. It didn’t taste good, but she forced me to drink a whole dropper of it. Dr. Franklin said if I did not eat it I would die. Just a little while ago she told me Dr. Franklin said he did not think I was going to live through the night. After she fed me she put me in the warm ‘incubator’ where I still cried, but not as loud. Finally I fell asleep. But, she woke me up again and made me eat again.

Then she woke me up again and made me eat again. The next time she woke me up one of my eyes opened. The light was strange. She made me eat, then she put me back in the incubator and we went in the big red Durango again. This time we went to see Dr. Franklin. He told mommy most of the time when birth mothers run off and leave babies like me, it is because there is something wrong with us. He told her he did not think I was going to live. I did not want to drink out of a bottle. All day Dr. Franklin and his friends forced me to drink. The powdered kitty milk made me very sick and I nearly died, again. But, by late in the afternoon I was ready to go back to my new home.

Mommy was having a big party. She picked me up in the big red Durango and made sure that Clancy did not bother me. We drove to Grandmother’s house for the party. Later that night, my god-mother Lisa came home with mommy because mommy was upset about her friend who ruined the party. Lisa fed me a couple of times that night, then left. I think I met her maybe once or twice again, but that was it.

And so we fell into a routine. Mommy would feed me every three hours at first. I did not know that mommy cats would like the bottoms of babies because we did not potty. Even as a tiny baby the process we used to potty was humiliating. Mommy would take warm q-tips and dampen them and make me potty. It was not fun. As I got bigger she would stick my tushie under the water. I would scream and scratch her. It is a wonder I do not have a phobia about water.

Finally, one day she let me come out of the incubator to play. I wasn’t very big. Siggy and Brunhilda were curious about me, but not all that interested. Mommy would hold me and feed me with a bottle. Then she would let me go to sleep on her arm while she typed on her computer. I still like doing this, but mommy says now that I weigh nearly 20 pounds I am too heavy to hold for very long. I still help her type. It is my favorite place, my mommy time.

One day mommy’s friend came to visit. They had an argument and I wanted to play with him. He threw me on the floor. Mommy got mad and told him he and to leave and never to come back. If he could not be nice to a baby kitten then she did not want …well, I think there was more to it than that, but you know how little kids are. We blame ourselves for everything. When I was about 5 weeks old, mommy discovered that my birth mommy was now living in our carport with three of my siblings. She was able to catch my brother who found a nice family. It took her three days to catch GeorgieW. My other sister got away, but would come back to live in the carport. Grand-mommy-cat, Mommy Cat’s mommy is her descendent, so everyone here is related.

GeorgieW did not want to live. She was going to die. Siggy adopted her and she started getting beautiful and strong, but she was never as big and strong as me. I still miss her very much. When I was a baby, mommy first named me Beverly Sills because of my loud voice. But Dr. Franklin said I was a little boy. Mommy decided I needed a name that would make people be afraid of me because I was so little and fragile so she named me Doc Holiday. Dr. Franklin was wrong. I am a girl.

And so life went on, happily. Then in February 2005 Clancy suddenly died. A few weeks later Siggy died of old age. Our family started to change, for the worst. A few days after Clancy died cat-astrophe struck my happy home. Mommy adopted Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reidhead. Life has never been the same. I do admit I stay up sometimes thinking of ways to get rid of the little monster. Later, in August, mommy rescued two more kittens. It became my responsibility to care for Mommy Cat (we had no name for her then) and Demon Cat. I will admit Demon Cat was my favorite. He and I were buddies, but he had some very bad habits. He also wasn’t a nice kitty. He now lives in San Patricio in a barn where he catches pigeons and has a very good life. Mommy Cat had babies. Then Brunhilda died.

Our family now consists of Mommy Cat, Little Joe Cartwright, Bat Masterson, monster dog, and moi. Now I am a mature adult. I am running for President of the United States. I am a well adjusted person, but there are many times when I stop and wonder why my birth mommy abandoned me. Did she really leave me there to die or did something scare her? I always tell myself it was the latter, but at night, when even Rumsfeld is quite, thoughts that I was not good enough come back to haunt me.

CAMPAIGN DISCUSSIONS CAN BE EXHAUSTING!

Currently Rumsfeld, Chair-poodle for Dogs for Doc is napping. He and Doc Holiday had a heated argument today about "campaign tactics" and both are resting. He is currently working on a fund-raising options.

CANINE-AMERICANS FOR DOC HOLIDAY FOR PRESIDENT

Several Canine-Americans have decided to jump on the Doc Holiday is Purrfect for America Bandwagon. Doc and I have settled our differences. I am now one of her biggest supporters. I am pleased to introduce Dogs for Doc, where I am the Chairpoodle. I am also thrilled to have been named an Honorary Chairpoodle for Doc Holiday is Purrfect for America!

If you are a Canine-American who would like to support Doc Holiday, please let me know. I will be glad to include you on the list.

Doc Holiday has promised me that she will campaign for treats for all doggies. She will also campaign for equal rights for Canine - Americans as well as Feline - Americans.

Join the Purrfect campaign!

Ronald Rumsfeld Reagan Reidhead
Chairpoodle - Dogs for Doc
Honorary Chairpoodle - Doc Holiday Is Purrfect for America